Sunday, August 14, 2011

10 Signs That You Use Social Media Just Tad Too Much

1. You refer to yourself with an @ symbol in front of your name.
2. You buy the personalized license plate: BRN2TWT
3. U rite in shrthnd
4. You look on Twitter to find out what your spouse has planned for dinner.
5. Your kids know that you are almost home from work because you just checked in on FourSquare at the gas station down the street.
6. You realize you have accounts with not only Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter, but Google+, Foursquare, Gowalla, Yelp, YouTube, Flickr, SlideShare, Digg, Scribt, Path, Ping, Focus, Quora, MySpace, Orkut, Chatter, Flipboard, Zite, Discus, Evernote, Instagram, PaperLi, FriendFeed, Tumblr and....
7. You actually use Apple's Ping.
8.You suggest to your child's teacher that she use Foursquare checkins to take class attendance.
9. You not only know who @scobleizer / +Robert Scoble is, you care.
10. You actually enjoy all the photos of sushi and cat videos being posted on Google+.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

25 Signs That You've Been Traveling Too Much…

Security lines. Airline food. Delayed flights. Armrest hogs. Expense reports. Woohoo.

People that don't travel much have this idea that business travel is exciting and tons of fun. Well the turbulence over Denver can certainly be exciting, but much of business travel is more mundane than great times. Oh certainly there are those occasional dinners at Brazilian steak houses and tours of the Dallas Cowboy's football stadium with 1,000 fellow conference attendees.

But most of the time business travel is about conference calls in a cab, missing the business-class upgrade by one person and finishing your presentation at 3:30 in the morning.

So for frequent travelers everywhere, here is my list of the “top 25 signs that you’ve been traveling too much”:

1. You open your bedroom door in the morning expecting to see a USA Today newspaper hanging from the door handle.

2. You pick up your dry cleaning on the way to the airport.

3. $15 for a club sandwich and fries sounds reasonable as long as it comes with the mini bottle of ketchup.

4. Your idea of a relaxing Saturday night is doing your expense reports on your iPad from the couch.

5. You actually figured out how to open those airline pretzel bags.

6. You do your holiday shopping at the Minneapolis airport between flights.

7. You won't buy anything over 3 ounces.

8. You don't understand why anyone would buy lace-up shoes or black luggage.

9. If you hear the words "middle seat" you break out in sweats, get sick to your stomach and have nightmares for a week.

10. Your new hobby is counting how many people on your flight have iPads.

11. You think the "stay vacation" concept is the greatest invention since the roller bag.

12. You signed up for GoGo Inflight's monthly recurring WiFi package.

13. Your spouse finds out what you are up to when friends read her your Foursquare updates.

14. You don't understand why there isn't a priority ordering line for frequent buyers at Starbucks.

15. You know exactly what to order at Chili's.

16. Your favorite scene in "Up In The Air" is when Ryan (George Clooney) and Alex (Vera Farmiga) compare their collection of loyalty cards.

17. Speaking of "Up In The Air," you first saw it while… up in the air.

18. You consider it a successful year if you were home for your kid's birthdays and your wedding anniversary.

19. You're surprised when someone serves you wine in something other than a plastic cup.

20. A "night out" for you is eating dinner alone in the hotel bar instead of ordering room service.

21. You know your passport number.

22. $300 noise-canceling headphones. Priceless.

23. You load the family into the SUV by row number.

24. You don't pack and unpack your suitcase, you replenish it.

25. You write a blog post about traveling too much – while on a flight home.

Let me know your favorite "sign" from above...or better yet...add your own list in the comments section below. See you up in the air...

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Have You Committed Any of These 12 “Twitter Football” Plays or Penalties?

One of the hottest topics among Twitterati these days seems to be the subject of etiquette and what is acceptable Twitter behavior. So in honor of the Super Bowl, the following are 12 “Twitter football plays” you need to be aware of. Have you run any of these football (American) plays?

1. Audible: You are engaged in a Twitter conversation among your tribe and the leader of the topic suddenly takes the conversation in an unplanned and different direction.

2. Blitz: Repeated postings of the same topic, news item, issue or request of followers. Most common use of this play recently has been the repeated requests to vote for companies in the Shorty Awards – including resorting to sending direct messages.

3. Bomb: Aggressive use of innuendo, swear words, titillating teases, Twitter elite references, crazy polls, etc. in an attempt to score as many new followers from a single Tweet as is possible.

4. Bump and Run: You post a tweet that prompts a number of replies @you but you disappear and the promising conversation dies.

5. Clipping or Stiff/Straight arm: A questionable attempt to block someone from taking your tweet in a direction you don’t want.

6. Fair Catch: Someone serves up a tweet @you and you catch it, perhaps say “thanks” but don’t advance the conversation.

7. Fumble, Incomplete Pass or Turnover: You serve up a retweet and no one clicks the link, retweets it again or posts a reply @you. It simply falls to the ground.

8. Hail Mary: A tweet that begs for followers, asks people to please click their link, or makes some last ditch plea.

9. Out of Bounds: This is when a member of the Twitter elite, that you are following because they are a subject matter expert, posts tweets outside of their “domain.” These can include venturing into areas such as religion and politics.

10. Personal Foul: Attacking an individually publicly when it isn’t called for or necessary.

11. Sack: A tweet or group of tweets that successfully stop the forward movement of someone else’s tweets or conversation.

12. Spike: Showing off when you score a Tweet touchdown. Occasional bragging is fine, but repeated chest beating should result in a Tweep being benched for a game.

Did I fumble the analogy? Do you have other Twitter football plays you’d like to add? Post your new ones or better versions of my plays in the comments below. If you need inspiration for football plays visit this football glossary.

24, 36, hut, hut hike…

Sunday, January 18, 2009

25 Reasons Why I Won’t Follow You on Twitter

One of the conundrums that people new (or even long-timers) to Twitter have is how to decide when to follow someone, particular after they’ve decided to follow you. Like most questions, there is no simple answer.

You need to find an approach that works for you. And undoubtedly you will change your approach over time and also make many exceptions to your “follow rules” along the way. That said, there seem to be three general types of follower strategies:
  • When someone follows you, you follow them in return. You feel compelled to, it is the courteous thing to do.
  • You follow almost no one. It is all about you, or you have a one-way strategy ala many of the large news organizations.
  • You follow people selectively. You check out who they are to see if they can add value to your personal or professional life, are just interesting or entertaining, etc.
When I started Twittering I took the first approach and followed pretty much everyone in return, with the exception of clear spammers. But then as my Twitter confidence grew and it became clear what I wanted from Twitter and what I was able to contribute, I started to become more selective. But just because I’m not following you today, doesn’t mean I won’t in the future.

So here is my list of Top 25 (serious and not so serious) reasons why I won’t follow you on Twitter:

1. You don’t have a photo or image in your profile. (Do not pass go, do not collect a follower.)

2. You do have a photo, but it is of a garage door in need of much repair. (Two Exceptions: 1. I love photography and it is a really cool, artsy B&W photo; or 2. You are a garage door repair company – oh, well I still won’t follow you.)

3. You have 3 posts, 2 people following you and you are following 7. (You may be the most amazing, brilliant and interesting person – but I just can’t tell yet.)

4. You are following 1,243 people and 47 are following you. (Hmm, have you considered using deodorant?)

5. Your Location is listed as: Wow, nirvana man! (Like, Smells Like Teen Spirit changed my life too dude, but like near which Starbucks do you reside mostly?)

6. Your only Tweet goes something like: “I just don’t get this Twitter thing, seems like a waste of time” or “Just checking things out.” (Hope you are not considering a future in marketing.)

7. I scan your last 20 or so Tweets and they all involve phrases like: anyone got any RedBull, I think I might be drunk, can someone Tweet me a cab, whoa I’m really f**ked up, just saw this really hot babe; how did I end up here. (I have nothing against being 24, single and living life to its fullest – well, oh maybe I do, as following you would be just too painful for this card-carrying member of the AARP.)

8. Your updates are protected. (Practicing safe Twitter? Hmm, guess you don’t want me to follow you anyway.)

9. Your Bio says: Sweat Pea Cosmetics consultant in Springfield. (Nothing against cosmetics consultants, I'm just not that interested in mascara, rouge and lipstick. Although, I could use a recommendation to get rid of these damn bags under my eyes.)

10. Your bio says: Follow me so I can try to sell you stuff. (FAIL)

11. Your Twitter handle is: @bigstick. (OK, well I’m happy for your being rewarded at birth, but remember size isn’t everything.)

12. Your Twitter Name is @PinkPanties. (Well, maybe I will follow you - but I won’t admit to it publicly.)

13. Your Bio says: I’m a cat. Follow me and I’ll make you purr. (Intriguing, but I’ll pass – my wife already thinks I’m stalking college girls on Facebook.)

14. Your Bio says: Nothing, it is blank. (Sorry, you FAILed Twitter 101.)

15. Your Bio has the word “chick” or “dude” in it. (OK, I’ll make exceptions on this one if used in the right context – like Chief Marketing Dude @Twitter.)

16. I click to check you out and the page doesn’t exist. (Obvious, but what the heck.)

17. Your Bio starts with “Ethically Steal….”. (Is that like “kind of pregnant?”)

18. I read your most recent Tweets and notice they are ALL TYPED IN UPPER CASE. (What, you think I’ll miss your point in a 140 characters?)

19. You are a company I could be interested in, but ALL of your posts are links to press releases or requests to vote for you in the Shorty (or similar) Awards. (Show me you can contribute to the conversation, and I’ll reconsider.)

20. Your Bio is a list of URLs. (

21. Your Bio says: Follow me and I’ll turn your annual income into a monthly income. (Wow, a math major – I can do that too. Divide annual salary by 12 = monthly income.)

22. Your Bio includes the word “guaranteed.” (If you aren’t selling death or taxes I’ll probably pass.)

23. Your Twitter background features pictures of people in leather, with whips and chains. (The pictures tell the story, why ruin it by following you.)

24. Your Bio says: Monster Trucks Rule! (What would we say to each other?)

25. Your Bio says that “your favorite wine is 'white zinfandel'.” (Sorry, I’ll admit it, I’m a wine snob.)

Yes, many of these were inspired by real Twitter profiles, but were modified to protect the innocent. If you think you recognize yourself – it isn’t you, was clearly someone else.

What are your favorite (serious or humorous) reasons for not following someone. Please @LorenMcDonald your reasons.

BTW, if you don’t follow me @LorenMcDonald - I won’t take it personally. And I’d like to thank @evansmom for reviewing this before I posted it to make sure I didn’t offend anyone.

Welcome to the Musings of Loren McDonald

Welcome to my blog. During the day I speak, write, do Webinars, blog, etc. on the topics of email marketing, B2B marketing, lead automation and similar topics. And usually in the evening I do the same thing.

Well with the explosion of Twitter, Facebook and other social networks it was finally time for me to have an outlet outside of work to express my rants, thoughts and comments.

Stay tuned and enjoy.